A Little Perspective and a Pitcher of Margaritas

I was having a conversation with my friend Karen the other day and I was telling her how bad I have always hated living in the south. It’s just too damn hot here. It seems the only time I really love living here is in the fall and winter months. I do not like the humidity and heat of the summer months. When it’s so hot outside you can’t breathe and even the shade doesn’t provide much comfort. Why do I always subject myself to this? Every summer it seems to be getting hotter and hotter. And every summer I bitch about how hot it is and I always say to my Mom, “tell me again why we live in the south?” 

I expressed to Karen the only reason I stay here is because of my parents. They are both in their 80’s and I’m the only child. I am still needed in some small way, to help them when they need it, run errands, or even to visit. If it wasn’t for my parents, I would move to some place I could call my Utopia that had the most pleasant weather all year round. I love snow, but I don’t want to live in Alaska. So where is my Utopia? I want some place with no humidity and the summer months don’t get above 80 degrees. Is that too much to ask for? I can get a job anywhere doing anything. So up and leaving everything I know isn’t a big deal or a problem for me. We don’t have children so there is nothing keeping us here…except for my parents. Tim and I both love traveling, meeting new people and seeing new places. We would not have a problem at all adjusting.

I received this email from Karen the next morning:

I thought this morning about what you said about ties and feeling stuck in Memphis and such. It's the grass is greener situation sometimes. You have family and are surrounded by love (and a little nuttiness - ha) and have ties and stability and those are all really nice things. Sorta warm and fuzzy looking in from this vantage point. So, while being more free might seem out of reach, you sort of have the best of both worlds. Vacations and yet, a stable "home". Job well done.

Karen has a way of putting things in perspective for me. Helping me to see there is another side to ponder. Having our little family (my parents and Tim) and familiar territory and people are huge. Maybe we could just settle for spending our vacation time at the places we would like to live – just visit different states. By the time we are retirement age, we will already know where we would like to purchase our summer home. Being young, I always thought it was weird how the “old people” would travel back and forth through the seasons. Now I realize they knew what they were doing! One of these days, I am going to be one of those “old people” traveling between homes. My Grandmother was from NY, where the winter months could be brutal on the old folk (and young too). I remember my Grandmother and her husband leaving NY in early fall headed to Texas for the winter. When spring time rolled around, they would leave and head back to NY. I am so going to be one of those people!! Only my plan will be reversed – during the summer months I will leave the South for a more desirable climate. Once winter hits, I will return to the south. Yeah, sounds like a wonderful plan!!

So in the mean time, I guess I just need to get a pool to cool my hot ass off in the summer. Now that’s not a bad idea! A cool place to chill out in with a pitcher of margaritas would be so nice. So thank you Karen, for helping me see where I need to be…for now. Cheers!