The Butterfly Dance

On more than one occasion I have been sitting on the interstate for whatever reason, and two butterflies will come dancing by in my view. They have no care in the world. They are flying and playing together happily. They are amazing little creatures to watch. Beautiful and graceful. It never occurs to them that they could get hit as they bounce in the lanes where normally vehicles and trucks would be roaring down the road. How nice it would be to bounce through life without a care. And to live life, no matter what situation you are in, as if the next moment were to never come.

On my way home from work one afternoon, I saw this ginormous yellow butterfly. It seems like they travel in pairs. These two were dancing all over the place. I don’t live very far from the first point I first saw them. I watched as they made it to my house and then no more. I never saw them again. I don't know where they went, but wherever it was, they were together & happy.

We could all learn something from this. You can't take life so seriously and be so blind that you miss the little things around you. God places his creations within our view for a reason. There is beauty every where! One day I asked my co-worker if she saw the sky on her way to work and how beautiful the colors were. She responded, "I was in a hurry, I didn't have time to see anything". Open your eyes and let your soul see past all the layers. This life goes fast enough. Slow down, watch & listen. I'm thankful that I pay attention to all the little things. Life is much sweeter when you do =)

A Little Perspective and a Pitcher of Margaritas

I was having a conversation with my friend Karen the other day and I was telling her how bad I have always hated living in the south. It’s just too damn hot here. It seems the only time I really love living here is in the fall and winter months. I do not like the humidity and heat of the summer months. When it’s so hot outside you can’t breathe and even the shade doesn’t provide much comfort. Why do I always subject myself to this? Every summer it seems to be getting hotter and hotter. And every summer I bitch about how hot it is and I always say to my Mom, “tell me again why we live in the south?” 

I expressed to Karen the only reason I stay here is because of my parents. They are both in their 80’s and I’m the only child. I am still needed in some small way, to help them when they need it, run errands, or even to visit. If it wasn’t for my parents, I would move to some place I could call my Utopia that had the most pleasant weather all year round. I love snow, but I don’t want to live in Alaska. So where is my Utopia? I want some place with no humidity and the summer months don’t get above 80 degrees. Is that too much to ask for? I can get a job anywhere doing anything. So up and leaving everything I know isn’t a big deal or a problem for me. We don’t have children so there is nothing keeping us here…except for my parents. Tim and I both love traveling, meeting new people and seeing new places. We would not have a problem at all adjusting.

I received this email from Karen the next morning:

I thought this morning about what you said about ties and feeling stuck in Memphis and such. It's the grass is greener situation sometimes. You have family and are surrounded by love (and a little nuttiness - ha) and have ties and stability and those are all really nice things. Sorta warm and fuzzy looking in from this vantage point. So, while being more free might seem out of reach, you sort of have the best of both worlds. Vacations and yet, a stable "home". Job well done.

Karen has a way of putting things in perspective for me. Helping me to see there is another side to ponder. Having our little family (my parents and Tim) and familiar territory and people are huge. Maybe we could just settle for spending our vacation time at the places we would like to live – just visit different states. By the time we are retirement age, we will already know where we would like to purchase our summer home. Being young, I always thought it was weird how the “old people” would travel back and forth through the seasons. Now I realize they knew what they were doing! One of these days, I am going to be one of those “old people” traveling between homes. My Grandmother was from NY, where the winter months could be brutal on the old folk (and young too). I remember my Grandmother and her husband leaving NY in early fall headed to Texas for the winter. When spring time rolled around, they would leave and head back to NY. I am so going to be one of those people!! Only my plan will be reversed – during the summer months I will leave the South for a more desirable climate. Once winter hits, I will return to the south. Yeah, sounds like a wonderful plan!!

So in the mean time, I guess I just need to get a pool to cool my hot ass off in the summer. Now that’s not a bad idea! A cool place to chill out in with a pitcher of margaritas would be so nice. So thank you Karen, for helping me see where I need to be…for now. Cheers!

Stop and Back Away from the List

I don’t know about your family, but in my family when we have a get together whether it’s a holiday meal or not, there is a list to be made. A list of the food that we want to serve, a grocery list of what we need to buy and a check-off list to make sure everything is on the table. These lists can serve to be very beneficial to the person who is doing the grocery shopping and cooking the food. The person doing the cooking can at anytime make changes to the said list, without prior notice.

Now, my family is small. And when I say small, it’s just my parents, my husband and I. So there aren’t many people who are affected by these lists. Ever since I can remember, my Mom has always made a list of any food that was served, what occasion it was (Easter, Mothers Day, Fathers Day, Christmas, etc) and who all attended, what we drank and what desserts we had. It doesn’t matter who is doing the cooking, my Mom will be making a list. She doesn’t cook anymore, but she makes the list. She doesn’t make the grocery list, just writes down what we are having.

When a dinner involving my Mom is going to happen, she has to go over the menu and go over it and go over it, make a list and talk about it, ask questions, lots of questions, all the time. I'm like "fuuu----k!" That's too much shit. I don’t need all this mental preparation. She will ask me what she is to bring and we go over that too. Not once, but several times. I even tried to say, “This is what I'm cooking. This is what you're bringing. It’s done. It's over”. To keep my stress level down, I came up with the perfect idea – I will cook everything! She doesn’t have to worry her pretty little head over anything. All you have to do is show up. I’ll do it all. So over the last several years, when she would ask what she could bring, I say "just yourself". Guess what? It didn’t work! That didn’t stop her from making a list of the shit I'M making and we have to go over that f----king list as well. A time or two I have said what we were having, then changed it only to hear “Well I don’t have that on the list”. Ugh! By the time this meal is over, I am ready for a margarita! Not one, but a pitcher full!

Each little detail about that meal will forever be recorded on a little piece of paper and tucked away, to be pulled out at some random time to remind you of what you ate and who was there. Yet there is nothing on this little piece of paper, mentioning who pissed me off by making a list, if the food was good, did anyone get sick from eating too much, were there any leftovers? You get the gist of it. Do I care that in 1992, my ex-husband was there and this is what we ate? Especially if I am married to someone different now? Nooooooooo!

I do make a list of the foods I would like to have and then I make my grocery list from that. And as I’m setting the table and putting the food on the table, I check my list to make sure I have everything out and that something hasn’t been forgotten. Oh, and my Mom will ask if I am going to take a picture of the table with all the food on it. Why is that necessary? I would much rather have photos of everyone around the table enjoying the food. Thirty years of food photos that doesn’t even remotely look appetizing is not my thing.

So, in the whole scheme of things, this is my Mom’s thing. It still drives me crazy and it won’t be long before I say “we are eating out!” These lists are something she wants to look back on (for whatever reason), but I don’t see the point. In the end, no feelings hurt. We can agree to disagree. All that matters is that we have a good time, eat a wonderful meal and enjoy being together. So tell me, where does the list fit in all that??

Business Card Billing

We had a really bad storm blow through here the end of April. We had some minor damage to our home from a large group of shingles that still had the roofing nails attached. My neighbor also had a large bunch land in her yard. Both sets of shingles hit our house. I called a repair company and the owner came out to give me an estimate. I asked him how we would pay since my husband and I would both be at work when they completed the repair. The owner said he would send me a bill. On May 3^rd, I called the siding repair guy to confirm if he was coming out because we had another storm that hit again the day before. He assured me he would be out. When I returned home from work, I found a business card on our front door, so I threw it on the desk and forgot about it.

All month long I’m waiting on a bill to come in the mail, like most companies would send if the say “we will send you a bill”. I never received anything. Today I’m going through mail, getting things ready to file, sorting, throwing way and I run across this business card. I set it to the side so I could file it with the rest of the business cards I have, should I need it in the future. During this entire desk cleaning, the business card got turned over and on the back was written “Please remit $100.00 to address on front”. Who does this?? I’m thinking I would be receiving something by mail along with a statement of what repairs were made and I had the redneck method all along. Wow, who needs a bookkeeper when you have business cards?! Does he stop by each month and throw another business card on your door should he not receive your payment? I suppose it’s a good thing I didn’t want to file this on my home owners insurance.

I appreciate the work this man did, even though he didn’t do some of it as agreed. And that part was so minor, but it was the fact he didn’t honor his word. If he had someone else come out in his place, he should have passed the word along to the guy who did do it. Granted he didn’t charge much. For any services your hire, you expect them to do it to the best of their ability. I would definitely use them again. Next time I will make sure I was here to inspect the work when it was completed.

As I was addressing the envelope to mail my payment, I started thinking that maybe my method of sending a payment should be through my front door. If I placed the envelope on my front door, would it magically appear at the address written on the front?

Walgreens and the Caveman

They always say there's a first time for everything, and that is so true. Sometimes those first times happen in unlikely places and at the most inopportune times. But, we just keep on going right? It's one of those little mystical moments in life that keep it interesting. So let me tell you about my moment.

One day last year after I got off work I stopped by our local Walgreen's. I walked to the pharmacy and people are waiting to get their meds. They have these chairs lining the walls and some that make an "L" shape for customers who are waiting. I took my place in line. I'm standing there in my own little world, fidgeting, but at the same time thinking I look cute. I'm moving my legs around, again fidgeting, when this man walks up to this lady who is ahead of me and hands her something. The only way I can describe this man is think a caveman wearing a tie-dyed shirt and blue jean shorts. His hair was long and all over the place. He wasn't standing there long before he walked off. I continue my little "leg dance" and this time putting a little booty into it, because I'm so ready to get out of the store.

I spot the monitor behind the counter, taping my every move. We know it’s there, we see ourselves on screen, yet we do silly things just to see if it’s us. I’m no different. I'm watching myself in the monitor, again thinking I look cute and still fidgeting. I hear something. Someone is behind me whispering. "Ma'am". "Ma'am". "Ma'am!" I'm thinking I hope no one is trying to get my attention. Surely they aren't talking to me. It's kinda like when you are walking down a street and someone honks. You don't want to look nor acknowledge you heard anything. I turn around to see caveman sitting there with another woman who is waiting for her meds.

Caveman waves for me to come over to him because he "needs to tell me something". I know I looked confused because I didn't know caveman and he couldn't possibly have anything to say to me. Again he says, "I need to tell you something" and continues to motion me over to him". I stood there becoming annoyed at his persistence and I replied, "no you don't". Caveman gets up, walks over to me and whispers something in my ear. I reach behind me and all I could do was bust out laughing! Laughing so hard I almost pee'd a little!

I thanked caveman, still laughing and turned around. Behind me, I could hear him talking to the other lady sitting there. He said "I would want someone to tell me if it happened to me" and she agreed. Finally, it was my turn in line. I paid for my meds and headed for the door. As I'm walking out the door, a "hooptie" car slowly passes by and honks. I look. Caveman is driving past me and waves hard at me. As if he had just accomplished a great task and wanted me to know, once again "he had something to tell me". I start laughing and wave back.

I arrive home and not long after, my husband comes home. I told him the story of my little adventure at Walgreen's and my interaction with caveman. And then it happens. My husband was laughing so hard, he couldn't breathe. And because he was laughing, it made me laugh uncontrollably, and again, I pee'd a little.

So to let you in on what caveman said to me, look below.